Your prose continues to impress. That said it is interesting you chose to go with the version of Hades and Persephone eloping. Even though that is quite “subversive” to most versions of the mythology.
I have to say, I do not like your characterization of Demeter. To the ordinary ancients she was the most important Goddess, overseeing the harvest they depended on for their livelihoods, and like them she knew suffering and loss. Too many adaptations simply turn her into a jealous shrew so they can ship Hades and Persephone. That relationship I feel can be quite contradictory, and in some ways more interesting than pure true love. Yes Hades abducted her, but he is genuinely true to her. I wish more adaptations would explore that contradiction, contrasting him to Zeus and Poseidon.
I also wish you had spent more time fleshing out your main girl before jumping straight into the main plot.
If I sound overly critical I apologize. However I feel honest feedback is beneficial to any writer, much more so than simple flattery.
Well two things Melinoe is part of the prelude and is less important than her younger sister who is the main girl.
As to Demeter, the point was to go with the og Greek tales and to have her redeem herself. Actually she later plays grandma to her grandson, mentoring him, rescuing him and nurturing him. I really liked writing those later chapters.
Glad you approve, I'm very nervous about these Silmarilli type notes, and hope they aren't too badly written. Wrote them years ago, and have never shared them with anyone, so hope the language isn't too much of a butchered version of a more Archaic Victorian style.
Your prose continues to impress. That said it is interesting you chose to go with the version of Hades and Persephone eloping. Even though that is quite “subversive” to most versions of the mythology.
I have to say, I do not like your characterization of Demeter. To the ordinary ancients she was the most important Goddess, overseeing the harvest they depended on for their livelihoods, and like them she knew suffering and loss. Too many adaptations simply turn her into a jealous shrew so they can ship Hades and Persephone. That relationship I feel can be quite contradictory, and in some ways more interesting than pure true love. Yes Hades abducted her, but he is genuinely true to her. I wish more adaptations would explore that contradiction, contrasting him to Zeus and Poseidon.
I also wish you had spent more time fleshing out your main girl before jumping straight into the main plot.
If I sound overly critical I apologize. However I feel honest feedback is beneficial to any writer, much more so than simple flattery.
Well two things Melinoe is part of the prelude and is less important than her younger sister who is the main girl.
As to Demeter, the point was to go with the og Greek tales and to have her redeem herself. Actually she later plays grandma to her grandson, mentoring him, rescuing him and nurturing him. I really liked writing those later chapters.
Wonderful! I love it and resdvit waiting for the dentist this morning 🦷😁
Aww thanks, hope the visit to the dentist went well!
Interesting mixture of three mythologies.
Glad you approve, I'm very nervous about these Silmarilli type notes, and hope they aren't too badly written. Wrote them years ago, and have never shared them with anyone, so hope the language isn't too much of a butchered version of a more Archaic Victorian style.